Few care, especially systematically, about the traumas that children bear from the war, but also about the traumas that children survive in domestic violence. We asked and researched the path of child victims of femicide. In the past year, we witnessed the murders of women, mothers in front of their children. The system failed to protect their mothers. We ask, do they want their children?
Femicide in the presence of a child. Only violence, which children often witness, can cause fear, trauma that, experts say, children deal with each in their own way. Imagine what can be caused by killing a mother in front of a child. All of this has lasting consequences for mental health.
“It is usually thought that children are small and will forget, but they won’t. Such things are not forgotten. As human beings we function on many levels, but one of the divisions is conscious and unconscious. Everything goes into our unconscious, our body remembers everything from the moment we were conceived until today – everything we experience. Especially when such intense events are involved, such as murder,” explains Arijana Ćatović, a psychologist at the Safe House of the Local Democracy Foundation.
We asked how to help the child and whether long-term consequences can be avoided with an adequate approach.
“Perhaps children are not thought of much now, because they are not put in the foreground as victims. However, at whatever age children are, they face consequences that require some professional help. Just the presence of that act or the absence of it brings with it a traumatic experience, that is, the lack of parents where children need adequate help and support”, emphasizes psychologist Mirela Hadžić.
The journey of caring for a child is not an easy process after such events. In the best case, the closest relative takes care of them, but in exceptional situations, the Center for Social Work usually takes care of minors. The approach is different depending on the age of the child.
“These are new people for the child. It experienced a shock, now it is experiencing something completely different. It would be ideal if the child could have a trusted person, whom he knows, with whom he can achieve closeness. Because the child needs to feel closeness, love and affection now in order to alleviate all the consequences”, says Ćatović.
“Depending on which traumatic event it is, and often these are serious crimes such as murder or some other form of abuse in the presence of a child, the institution’s priority is to provide adequate health care to the child. Determine if there are injuries of a physical nature, and then proceed with psychological treatments. It all depends on the age of the child. A two- to four-year-old child is not the same when it comes to care – social, health, psychological”, emphasizes Lejla Sadiković, director of the Public Institution Center for Social Work Tuzla.
They are entitled to them, by law, until the age of 18. What after that?
“In any case, our concern does not stop, at least when it comes to this center. There is a large number of children with whom we are in contact. Especially with those who have decided to enroll in a university, to work, to go abroad after leaving the institution”, adds Sadiković.
The profession is unanimous in one thing: in order to prevent any new form of violence, it is necessary to act preventively.
“Violence can be prevented with early intervention. Violence against women and children has become common and it is unfortunate. The numbers and statistics are devastating. We are always ready to help, of course, in cooperation with the competent institutions. We want to help preventively and prevent violence of any kind,” says Nancy Catherine Baumann, a specialist in UNICEF’s children’s service.
And we all want to prevent violence, but apart from wishes, concrete systemic moves by competent institutions are needed. Citizens’ messages are clear and loud, and the system is waiting.
Photo: Archive